Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem!!!
Things that make you go .....Hmmmm?
Take your pic.
From the worlds most profound philosopher.
If the Bible has taught us nothing else -- and it hasn't -- it's that girls should stick to girl's sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such.
It takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.
"Phfft! Facts. You can use them to prove anything.
Hey, just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand!
In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!
You don't win friends with salad.
You can't keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once, and move on.
Trying is the first step towards failure.
Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel.
If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.
I want to share something with you -- the three sentences that will get you through life. Number one, "Cover for me." Number two, "Oh, good idea, boss." Number three, "It was like that when I got here."
When you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get afterwards!
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!
Do I know what rhetorical means?
Is there nothing doughnuts can't do?
We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well, I didn't hear anybody laughin', did you?
Maybe, just once, someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene."
I'll tell people what to think. Now you tell me what to think.
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.
God bless those pagans.
I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are.
The lesson is : Our God is vengeful! O spiteful one, show me who to smite and they shall be smoten!
What's the point of going out, we're just going to end up back here anyway?
You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel.
I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman!
But I'm not a missionary! I don't even believe in Jebus! ..........Save me Jebus!
I don't have to be careful, I've got a gun.
I don't mind being called a liar when I am lying, when I am about to lie or just finished lying ... but not when I am telling the truth.
Ladies and gentlemen, if I could have your attention for a moment ... I would become a better public speaker.
Hey, there's something you don't see in a toilet everyday.
This is everyones fault but mine.
From the worlds most profound philosopher.
If the Bible has taught us nothing else -- and it hasn't -- it's that girls should stick to girl's sports, such as hot oil wrestling and foxy boxing and such and such.
It takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.
"Phfft! Facts. You can use them to prove anything.
Hey, just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand!
In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!
You don't win friends with salad.
You can't keep blaming yourself. Just blame yourself once, and move on.
Trying is the first step towards failure.
Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel.
If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.
I want to share something with you -- the three sentences that will get you through life. Number one, "Cover for me." Number two, "Oh, good idea, boss." Number three, "It was like that when I got here."
When you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose: it's how drunk you get afterwards!
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!
Do I know what rhetorical means?
Is there nothing doughnuts can't do?
We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well, I didn't hear anybody laughin', did you?
Maybe, just once, someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene."
I'll tell people what to think. Now you tell me what to think.
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.
God bless those pagans.
I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are.
The lesson is : Our God is vengeful! O spiteful one, show me who to smite and they shall be smoten!
What's the point of going out, we're just going to end up back here anyway?
You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel.
I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman!
But I'm not a missionary! I don't even believe in Jebus! ..........Save me Jebus!
I don't have to be careful, I've got a gun.
I don't mind being called a liar when I am lying, when I am about to lie or just finished lying ... but not when I am telling the truth.
Ladies and gentlemen, if I could have your attention for a moment ... I would become a better public speaker.
Hey, there's something you don't see in a toilet everyday.
This is everyones fault but mine.
Last edited by kenny on Wed Nov 15, 2006 8:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I used to go missing a lot...Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World.
I've stopped drinking, but only while I'm asleep.
I was in for 10 hours and had 40 pints - beating my previous record by 20 minutes.
-- (on a blood transfusion for his liver transplant, not on his Drinking)
Robert Redford used to be such a handsome man and now look at him: everything has dropped, expanded and turned a funny colour.
He cannot kick with his left foot, he cannot head a ball, he cannot tackle and he doesn't score many goals. Apart from that he's all right.
-- (his assesment of Manchester United's David Beckham)
And my personal favourite!:
I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.
-all the legend that is George Best
I've stopped drinking, but only while I'm asleep.
I was in for 10 hours and had 40 pints - beating my previous record by 20 minutes.
-- (on a blood transfusion for his liver transplant, not on his Drinking)
Robert Redford used to be such a handsome man and now look at him: everything has dropped, expanded and turned a funny colour.
He cannot kick with his left foot, he cannot head a ball, he cannot tackle and he doesn't score many goals. Apart from that he's all right.
-- (his assesment of Manchester United's David Beckham)
And my personal favourite!:
I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.
-all the legend that is George Best
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