Organ donor jokes not welcome; they are old, boring and in pretty poor taste - thanks...That said, I thought I'd scribble something down that details the first 1000 miles of biking for me, as I know there are a few other forum members thinking seriously about doing this.
Some may not know that I've recently passed my bike test and started with a rather silly bike - a 2000 Kawasaki ZX-7R. 750cc nineties superbike homologation job. Not possibly the ideal first bike, but I've loved them ever since watching Scott Russell win the WSBK title on one. I figured I might as well get something I wanted from the off, rather than spending 6 months on a sensible naked bike and losing money on it - the throttle goes both ways after all.
Seems, in hindsight, to have been a very shrewd choice. I got myself a cracker for pennies, so depreciation isn't really an issue with this - I could probably ride it for 20,000 miles and get back what I paid for it. It's in good nick, but had a few cosmetic scrapes, so I'm not so hugely worried about dropping it (crash bungs in place, however) Plus, even though it was a fire-breathing superbike in it's day, it's a little heavy and down on power compared to say, a current GSXR750 and it's got quite relaxed handling (plus what's regarded as still one of the best front ends in the business) No real spikes in the power delivery either.
Downsides are that it's heavy, steering lock isn't the best (low speed maneuvering with all you weight on your wrists can be challenging) and you ride along with a little devil whispering in your ear... constantly...
So, impressions of a new biker (hadn't ridden a bike for more than a few hundred yards before doing this)
The Tests:
Did my DAS course with a great little outfit in Ayr called Pegasus. Hugely flexible in how you wanted to do things - I did CBT, then did a couple of weekends on the bike before the module 1 (the closed test centre part of the new test) and another day's riding before my module 2 (the traditional on-road bit)
I did about the minimum hours on the bike I could have to get through the test - amounted to 1 day CBT, 3 days module 1 training and 1 day module 2 training. The guys at Pegasus were a little twitchy about me doing module 2 with only a day specific training on it, but I passed with only a couple of silly minors, so it must have been a very good day! Looking back, I'd have done another day, as I was a bit unprepared for the module 2 (the first time I saw the test route I used was when I was sitting it!)
There is a lot to learn - made easier of course if you already have a driving license and some road sense. I had to sit a theory test (as I'm old) but that was a piece of pish. Definately the hardest thing for me was the module 1 stuff - low-speed maneuvering through cones being my weaker point. Still - lots of practise at that meant I could do it without thinking too much in the actual test - Pegasus were great here as they actually have a lot with all the maneuvers set out as you do it in the test - so no surprises when you get to the test centre.
The on-road stuff is done with a radio link to the examiner/instructor and the key thing is observation - lots of obvious checks. Add in road positioning and general awareness of conditions and it's not too difficult.
Riding:
My first run was actually the night I passed my test - DDtB, McApe and VXJon came down to my gaff and we went on a short backroad blast to get me into it. Loved it and didn't find myself out of my depth or pushing too hard, so guessed I was gonna like this
I then did a commute blast across to EDI for an evening out for work - which ended at something like 4am and I rode back (no drinking of course) Got caught in a rainstorm in the middle of the M8, so it was a good intro into riding in dodgy conditions - didn't scare myself, so was pleased at that.
Have also been doing regular back roads runs myself to get my mileage up and confidence in the bike. I think the key is to nibble at the edges of your comfort zone, but not to push to the point that you have a moment or scare yourself. Pleased as punch that in the first 1000 miles I can only really point to one time I've gone into a corner a little too hot for my comfort and the bike just went round - but I've not been doing it regularly and pushing my luck. Have no intention of becoming a statistic!
Second run I did with DDtB et all was last weekend, to Oban. Just a totally awesome day! Brilliant weather and good craic. No ego at all floating about, with the feel very much like Elise runs of old - go at the pace you're happy with and no hassle if that's slower or faster. Did about 360 miles and was pretty shattered at the end of the day - found myself winding back the pace as I tired, hugely unfit and it's a big bloody bike to get turned! Concentration is key - if it feels like you're going too fast to take everything in, you are!
Was out with Jon for a blast on Sat as well - we shot over to KH for a natter. Less miles covered, but still some great little sections - opened the bike up properly in a few safe locations and gave myself an epic attack of the giggles... Lets just say I had a rude shock after shifting into third after redlining first and second, looking down and seeing a short stint at HM's pleasure staring back at me! Assuming I'd been on public roads... Which of course, I wasn't.
So, in short, I'm loving it. I fully appreciate it's not for everyone - there is an increased risk factor thanks to the other tools on the road and the fact that bikes don't protect you in any way. For me, that focuses you much better and makes the whole experience that bit more exciting. You can ride well within your limits and still get a huge buzz that you can only get in the car when you're really on it.
That said - I won't be selling the Elise. I've been using it as well as the bike recently and instead of making it seem dull, the bike just emphasises what the Elise is very good at - the ability to be relatively sensible as well as batsh*t crazy, all dependant on how you drive it.
So, if you're considering it - do your CBT. Tomorrow. £100ish is a very small price to pay to figure out if you'll like it (you will know when you've finished the CBT) and I have just loved every second. Be aware though - you are very much in control of your own life - be a tit and it's very easy to end up in a wheelchair or six feet under - probably very wise never to forget that.
That's all - thanks for listening to the pish
KIDDING! 
and i've got to say i've been impressed with my dealings with other road users. Of course you get the odd tit who doesn't want to let you pass (esp. on m8) but people seem to be more keen to get out of the way than in the car. So much so that you sometimes feel like shouting "it's ok im going to make it past without you driving in the gutter" as people fall out of the way. 
) Brings back memories from when I passed. 