Scottish Elises

Yup.

One came to our door about a month ago, wee card saying "I am polish would you like to buy my drawings". He then rattled through a portfolio of dodgy prints before wandering off.

YOu get loads of these in spain/greece all the tourist destinations. Drop a laminate card at your table which says something like "I am deaf dumb and mute and have throat cancer" and they usualy try to get you to buy something. If they really are deaf they shouldn't get annoyed when you tell them to f.... off.

After a few days sitting on a beach in Goa you soon develop a look that says "dont come anywhere near me"

Heh - I've developed that look.

Mandy moved offices to one in Anderson and as such I'm not keen on her walking to the station if she works late at night or has been out with the girls after work.

Still at least I get to chat to Shug whilst waiting for her, he always seems to be in the area

Mac

mac wrote: Still at least I get to chat to Shug whilst waiting for her, he always seems to be in the area

Mac

I didn't buy a gold Merc for nothing you know....

We also get eastern europeans coming to our place, pretending to be a charity collecting clothes. When you read the small print, it tells you they are infact a business.

Basically anyone who comes to my door begging, selling something, or trying to convert me to some bullsh*t religion, gets told to F*ck right off.

if i want you to come to my door, ill invite you!

It was the forwardness of turning up on my doorstep. They even interrupted me eating my dinner, drinking wine and counting my money

What the fcuk was the butler doing

Giles

The one that really gets me is a guy with a blonde middle-shade, quite rotund, who comes around the pubs selling badges for 'kids with cerebral palsy.' When I was back in Dundee, I saw him getting forcibly ejected from the Nether Inn, with the manager threatening to call the police about his fraudulent charity collecting. Saw him in Mathers (Broughton Street, Ed), reminded him of this, and off he shot.

Seen him around a few pubs again, but he seems to give me a wide berth - next time i collar him, I'll be taking down his particulars and getting the polis.

As for the poles, there seems to be hundreds of them in Edin just now. Read an article recently that said in the last 2 years, the number of poles in the capital is up to 30,000 from 12,000!

Does that explain all the Pole Dancing bars?

Oh Dear.

And here was me trying to avoid the Chick Murray joke!

"man walking down the street with a long stick under his arm"

Passerby asks "Are you a Pole Vaulter?"

"No, I'm German" he replies "but how did you know my name was Walter?"

I havent had beggars yet but i do get wee neds asking for sponsorship with no sponsorship form?! They have a better chance of getting blood out of a stone!

Back at home we get quite a few, but when I answer the door with two very excited, friendly and noisy jet black patterdale terriers, one under each arm, curiously they don't hang about.

Apparently through the glass all you can see is these white flashing teeth and this somehow puts them off.

No commitments these beggars, tsk.

Rich

tbh i tend to look thru the peep hole and if i dont' recognise the person on the other side i just go back to watching tv!

ninja

But if its a scruffy, damp and tired looking fellow it could be an SE member! Who, having been sick after spotting your new Maplins neons, has careered off the road and is in need of assistance!

Or it could be a tramp.