FRENCH FROLIC 10 - 21/8 to 28/8

[Scotty C]

I would have been happy to come home on Sunday as the trip was legendary by then already.

I didn't fancy the. 2 hours each way to the track today and I'm saving myself for
Ledanon tomorrow.

Can you guys stop posting sh*t on our thread

[Kelvin]

I would have been happy to come home on Sunday as the trip was legendary by then already.

I didn't fancy the. 2 hours each way to the track today and I'm saving myself for
Ledanon tomorrow.

Can you guys stop posting sh*t on our thread

Oh and BTW Scotty when did you get the moob job?

[robin]

Whatever. Decided to do some mountaions today insted of another hot track ( fcuk french keyboard) did about 400 miles and quite happy now Robin

[tut]

On your own Robin?

tut

[Bob vanM]

Robin, so your car is behaving well so far ! good to hear

[campbell]

I get the impression the cars are behaving a lot better than their drivers, Bob.

That's the spirit lads If it wasn't already the last Frolic, it probably would be now...anyone related to SE will be lucky to be allowed back into France at this rate!

[DDtB]

Scotty, myself, Stu P and Benny never made the track today... Quiet day off with some mild mannered driving involved!

poor show

I managed to make it after only 3 hours sleep and a very fuzzy head!!! Bunch of lightweights!!!

[Scotty C]

Ledenon was legendary totally scorchio. Got to be one of the most fun tracks ever.

Another quiet one tonight

[Modena Scotland]

Guys, where are the reports????

Trust you all had fun

[GregR]

I'm amazed to be the first one to post up a report on this and subject to the "Senior Member's" approval I'd like to offer the following:-

Thursday, pack up and await BennyTaxi to AndyG's for a frolic departure. Benny arrives in DaveH's car smelling like a brewery and hot foots it over to the poorer side of town for a rendezvous at Chez Bennett (after stopping off to pick up my newly arrived race/gimp booties from the Royal Mail warehouse in Murrayfield).

Arrive at Benny's to find Hay having the fright of his life after his boss rumbled him taking a cheeky extra day's leave. All sorted and all happy again. Robin has clutch issues and AliC is at MMC. The Rangie is fired up, beer fridge connected and Team Rolfe/Gordon splash our way down the A1 towards the Geordie express.

At North Berwick we stop for a tactical refuel. The rain is battering down so heavily it soaks MrG despite his being under the cover of the petrol station roof. Much amusement about the rainy drive awaiting the 2-11 drivers on the '68.

We arrive at Newcastle behind Dodgy Dave and get waved through customs first. First Cidre's (spelling police take note, that is what Stella has called its new rocket-fuel) cracked as we were technically in international waters and then we're loaded on to the boat. Once there, off up to the top deck's 'Sky Bar' to look at the queue of Lotuses arriving. Notable exceptions being AliC, Gary and Neil. Everyone's boarded and the staff have exited the ticketing booths. A twinkle of something in the distance gives away Ali's convoy and they barrel down the ramps and seem to be held up in the customs sheds - Cue much hilarity about forensic examinations and rubber gloves - and then they're eventually allowed on board.

We sit 'up top' for what appeared to be 50 bottles of Magners then headed down for a wee game of Irish Bingo and some more Magners. Benny's 'old lad' popped out at some point (I know not why) although he shied away from chatting up a lady whilst it was out catching a breath.

The night gets hazy at this point for me, but I recall throwing nuts at Geordies, various cries of, "show us yer monkey" and a bit of dancing. There was some gambling, including at last orders time when the remainder of the kitty went on red. It came in black.

Next morning arrives and we're all feeling the worse for wear. The pitfalls of being first on the boat become apparent as we wait 45 minutes in the Rangie before our 'balcony deck' is lowered so we can disembark. A few sat nav disagreements later and we're at Zandvoort for about 11am.

Late 'briefing' from Golding constitutes, "you driven on track before? Any 'real ones, or just Knockhill," and we're told about a chap in a VX that parked it backwards into a tyre-wall with Walshy giving instruction. This was to lead to Walshy's inability to do anything other than booze and make little sense for the remainder of the week.

Out to the race car and we note a few teething issues. One - driver's seat doesn't move. Two, someone's fitted the pax seat belts for a 25-stone person. Two hours of faffing and fannying later and we're ready for some sighting laps.

Out of the pits to a big right hand banked hairpin towards a little kink left, then right to a 2nd gear left hander. Out of that and foot to the boards over a rise to the right then left and a blind crest to a third gear right hander. Out with Scotty later in the day I was sure I saw him nudging 130, flat in fourth over this section. It then gets less exciting. My turn, Benny offers his not inconsiderable bulk as ballast and I'm given a helping hand from Mr Hay staying 2 feet from my bumper through my first few laps. Those guys know how to help a newbie in need.

Lunch and re-hydtation came in the form of overpriced coke and two cheese n ham toasties then back on it in the Afternoon. Getting quicker, and apart from some misunderstanding on the part of the man waving me out of the pits ("schtop, schtop ..that white line ish not to be croshed" - no idea what he was on about as I thought he was complementing me nearly losing it into turn one….)

Bored of typing now - next instalment to follow once enthusiasm returns…

[Mike Scib]

Keep them coming

[GregR]

I get a shot of Benny's car at Zandvoort and I aimed to have his tunez blaring out as I passed the lads in the paddock. Apparently they couldn't hear Benny's Taio Cruz over the sound of his rev limiter (was it three or four times in the first three corners?!). Shame that.

A few more laps of fun later and we decide its time to hit Amsterdam. We must have really hacked off our nav as it starts taking us all sorts of stupid places before we arrive to see the crew all well rested in the grounds of the hotel. Herr Von Iddon took the 'sensible' option of looking after Walshy's Mrs so he could come out with us in the evening. No he didn't have a room booked.

We have acouple then Dominique kindly takes us into town. We stop for a brief pit stop and Scotty reveals the age gap between him and his new Mrs. We get to see a few photos and that's it. We then learn the Dutch for "show us yer monkey" (lad yer ap sehen) and continue into town. The dutch equivalent of a GeeWhiz is expertly lifted by Crozier/Cruickshank double-act. Its only about 8pm and the night is shaping up to be a good 'un. Another pit stop, then we head in to an Argentinian Steak House for some nose-bag.

Willy-waving commences with a game of 'who can order the biggest steak'. Mrs Hay comes last with 250 grams, Ali C topping the scales at 550g. We then get onto the discussion of what the drive down to France will be like in the sweltering heat. Benny thinks it will be a good idea to do it simply in his 'undercrackers'. Scotty likes this idea. Dave does too. Far from this being a forfeit, it seems to be the formation of 'team gimp' for the rest of the trip. The forfeit emerges and the loser of a game of paper scissors stone has to do the journey in the pants wearing a gimp mask, perhaps with pool ball in the mouth. Interesting.

Thereafter the evening falls into the category of 'what goes on tour stays on tour.' All I'll say is that a mask was bought.

We get in to the hotel room at around 4am. Alcohol and the meat-sweats prevent a decent night's kip.

Up with the larks the following day we see Corbie having some car issues. We hear of Walshy and StuP doing laps of the 'balcony' on floor 8 slamming shut people's windows. This "balcony" was basically a small ledge with a foot-high wall to prevent a fall.

A few people are beginning to rise so we fire up the Rangie and try to get a head start off to Nancy. No idea how long that took as my head hurt, but we arrived, re-stocked le fridge du beer and awaited the arrival of the others. Interestingly there was a French riot police convention being held at the hotel. I think it was Scotty who blasted over a small junction hitting the rev-limiter who noticed them. Luckily only a wee thumbs up from le gendarmerie.

Out for more steak and more beer and wine. We spot a McDonalds and see they sell beer. We think we can get 24 McFlurry's and 24 beers. Apparently not - you need a meal to get a beer. We ended up with 24 McFlurrys. Benny takes on the challenge of getting round the kiddie's playpark in the quickest time. He holds the current record (with scars to prove it) of 27 seconds. No-one else bothered after seeing the teary French kiddies off to report him to their parents.
There's a Sherman tank parked to a memorial to the French Resistance. I'll let whoever's got the picture post that up …

Back to the hotel, for some 7euro a pint round action. Neil leaves 3/4 of a pint. His car is 'decorated' accordingly. StuP's workshop is being broken into. Walshy refuses to take the barman's last-orders as a reason to stop serving him drink.

Next morning, out to the car park to find all of Scotty's race wheels on the bonnet of the Rangie and race pod. It is raining, and it looks like rather than untie the tyre rack some monkeys have forced the tyres through the racks. There's a smell of wet sheep in the race pod.

[Shug]

There's a smell of wet sheep in the race pod.

Epic cliff hanger...

[Cisco]

Just home this morning.

Snow on Stelvio, scary on 48's, and carnage at the Ring!

Epic's not a word I use but it just about sums up this trip

Take care,

Frank

[Andy G]

getting handed the keys to the Gallardo at 2 of the tracks to do the sighting laps

Man i love it when Walshy injures himself

Epic trip, despite having a few work issues while away, and many thanks to everyone who made it such an epic, not to mention my co-driver "The Rolfe" who seems to have taken up my usual story telling, with an even better vocabulary and turn of phrase.

Wont tow again though - not for me - missed out on too many antics with the boys (although the tortoise (Rangie) frequently beat the hares to venues), and driving the 40ft Rangie convoy would have been brutal if i hadnt of had a pax in particularly good form, although the 16C ac did win some friends, as did the 52 can beer fridge.

All of you with tyres still at my house, bags, helmets - Mrs wants to get the house ready for sale

Ledenon - i you

tbc

Should add - the mule had a roof as PSR had bolted one on it which we couldnt remove! Not exhaust heat sheild meant it was a VERY hot place to spend time! Bloody magic wee car though, and even on the "run in" map was out there is amongst it all.

Also - thanks to Uncle Ron, Benny & Scotty for shots in their cars - forget how good the Elise is showroom fresh in SC form, and Benny and I had a few "alternative laps" - Scottys 2-11 just showed me how epic brakes can be - great car - even if the owner does get you black flagged for staying out having fun too long Ron - its suspension time next